Jay Shetty is a behavioral science graduate from Cass Business School, an author, life coach, and host of the On Purpose podcast. He is also chief purpose officer at Calm. You should do what’s best for you, she told him. I want to be clear. I’m not sure where our relationship is going. He was unsure at first, but a month after she left, he moved to Austin. Many people have lost someone naturally or after a long relationship has broken down—does that mean that all the other love in their life is disqualified? Some of the most incredible things in the world, some of the most amazing sacrifices and the greatest acts of love were not because of romantic love, but because of a person’s love for their people, for society, for humanity. In the first ashram, Brahmacharya, we prepare for love by learning how to be alone and learning from our past relationships how to improve our next one. Alone, we learn to love ourselves, to understand ourselves, to heal our own pain, and to care for ourselves. We experience atma prema, self-love.

But anyway, aku bukan mau bahas korelasi lagunya JKT48 dg buku ini ya. Aku malah pengin share what key takeaways yg bikin aku menyadari sesuatu dalam hubungan kami.

We’ve put romantic love on such a pedestal in society that we believe that even if you have an amazing relationship with your dad, mom, kids, siblings, and friends, but don’t also have romantic love, then you are incomplete. Don’t compare all these beautiful bonds that we have. Is the love you have for your children less important or more important than the love you have for your partner or your own parents? You probably came to this book wondering how to find or keep love with a partner. We want love in our lives, and we naturally assume it should take the form of romantic love. But it’s a misconception that the only love in your life is between you and your partner, your family, and your friends. It’s a misconception that life is meant to be a love story between you and one other person. That love is just a stepping-stone. Having a partner isn’t the end goal. It’s practice for something bigger, something life-changing, a form of love that is even more expansive and rewarding than romantic love." Aku ngeh banget gimana usahaku buat nggak mengulangi pola yg sama dg kekurangan orangtuaku (makanya aku baca buku kayak gini..). Tapi rupanya tanpa sadar aku juga punya standar yg nggak aku cantumin dalam ceklisku. Misalnya nih, karena dibesarkan dg ayah yg hobi ke museum & toko buku, aku jadi nyari partner yg juga bakal enjoy kalau ku ajak ke sana. I want to feel that kind of excitement dg orang yg kusayang & yg sayang dgku.

My favorite section that I appreciate so much is on letting go. On the way our emotions get ahold of us, but aren't actually good for us nor true sometimes. As well as how easy it is for us to slip into something, to let our feeling get a hold, without thinking through or working on ourselves first, and realising what we want and what we're looking for. If there was one book I was able to hand out to someone going through a breakup, someone who can't seem to get over their ex while their ex did, someone in a one-sided relationship, someone needing to work on their familial relations, someone working on themselves; loving and getting to know themselves, or just about anyone in this world, it would, time and time again, be this book. When I decided to ask Radhi to marry me, I set out to arrange the best, most romantic proposal of all time. I asked a friend about engagement rings and bought her a classic diamond ring. Then, on a beautiful spring evening in 2014, I suggested to her that we meet near London Bridge to take a walk down the bank of the Thames (we were living in London at the time). I told her we were going to a nice place for dinner, knowing she would dress appropriately for the night I had planned. Just as we passed an idyllic spot with one of the best views in the city, a man suddenly appeared and gave her a huge bouquet. As she was marveling over the flowers, an a cappella group burst out of nowhere and joined the bouquet-bearing man to sing the Bruno Mars song Marry You. I got down on one knee and proposed to her. She cried; I cried too. After she said yes, a vegan meal was delivered, and we sat down to eat at a table I had set up on the bank of the Thames. She thought that was the end of the fanfare, and we got up to head home, but as we rounded a corner, there was a white horse-drawn carriage. We climbed aboard, and it carried us through the city, passing all the major sights. She was shouting out, I’m engaged! and passersby cheered for us. Finally, we went to share our good news with her parents. Nobody sits us down and teaches us how to love. So we’re often thrown into relationships with nothing but romance movies and pop culture to help us muddle through. Until now. Dalam 8RoL, Shetty menekankan kalau beda antara "mencintai" dg "memiliki" tuh tipis banget. Seringkali kita memaknai "cinta" sinonim dg "ownership." Padahal setiap manusia punya otoritas atas dirinya sendiri. Every one of us punya kuasa buat nentuin mau dibawa hubungannya (you sing, you lose). That's one thing. The other thing yg aku syukuri adalah: Syemmi ngasih aku banyak "gift" yg selama ini aku dapatkan dari orangtuaku.Nobody sits us down and teaches us how to love. So we’re often thrown into relationships with nothing but romance movies and pop culture to help us muddle through. Until now." A lot of studies and research have gone into why being alone, being confident, and being single is not only better for you, but also better for your future partner. Professor and clinical psychologist Bella DePaulo says, “It’s a broad misconception that single people are to blame for the high levels of loneliness reported internationally.” In fact, studies show that overall, the longer people are single in life, the happier they become. We are drawn to love as we are drawn to a flower—first by its beauty and allure—but the only way we can keep it alive is through consistent care and attention. Love is a daily effort. I want to develop the habit of love with you in this book. I’ll introduce you to practices, mindsets, and tools that will help you love in a way that brings daily rewards, season after season. Kāds teiks, ka šī grāmata ir mūsdienu "pop'kultūras" ilustrējošs piemērs - un tomēr, tā (šī) ir tieši tāda pasaule, kādā dzīvojam. Steidzīgā. Krāsu, emociju, notikumu pārsātinātā. Nebeidzamu vajadzību un nesasniedzamu priekšstatu karuselis!

The storybook version of love I displayed for Radhi wasn’t the love that would sustain our relationship. Fairy tales, films, songs, and myths don’t tell us how to practice love every day. That requires learning what love means for the two of us as individuals and unlearning what we thought it meant. That’s why I’m sharing my imperfect story. I don’t know everything, and I don’t have everything figured out. Radhi has taught me so much about love, and I continue to learn with her. I’m sharing all this book’s advice with you knowing how much I could have used it myself and will use it in the future. Love is not about staging the perfect proposal or creating a perfect relationship. It’s about learning to navigate the imperfections that are intrinsic to ourselves, our partners, and life itself. I hope this book helps you do just that. The oldest Hindu scriptures we studied are called the Vedas. They were written on palm leaves in Sanskrit more than five thousand years ago. Most of the palm leaves no longer exist, but the texts have survived. Some of them are even online. Their presence and relevance in the modern world always amaze and inspire me. I’ve been studying the Vedas for sixteen years now, and for the three years I lived as a monk I studied them deeply. When I saw the practical and accessible wisdom hidden within them, I started sharing these messages and insights with people around the world through podcasts, books, and videos. A big part of my work today is coaching individuals and couples and training others to do the same. This work has allowed me to certify more than two thousand coaches, all of whom use a curriculum I developed that is rooted in Vedic principles. Which is that this is an objectively terrible book by someone young with a large follower for unknown reasons. I think his credentials are seriously that he is married (he won't ever let the reader forget it), that he was a monk for a bit (won't let that one go either) and that he is a coach (what does that even really mean). He was a monk for three years (age 22-25). It's more than any average person sure but that's.... really not a lot of time to be making big proclamations. In the first ashram, Brahmacharya, we prepare for love. We don’t get in a car and start to drive without studying for a learner’s permit and practicing the core skills in a safe space. When we take a new job, we might prepare by learning a new computer program, talking to people we’ll be working with about what might be expected of us, or reviewing whatever skills we might need. And we prepare for love by learning how to love ourselves in solitude. Alone, we learn to understand ourselves, to heal our own pain, and to care for ourselves. We acquire skills like compassion, empathy, and patience (Rule 1). This prepares us to share love because we’ll need these qualities when we love someone else. We will also examine our past relationships to avoid making the same mistakes in relationships going forward (Rule 2).Researchers from the German Center of Gerontology analyzed data from more than 2,500 participants in a German aging survey. They found that as time went on, people became happier with their single status, and their relationship status became less relevant to them. DePaulo writes that over time, single life gets better and better, and for individuals as they age, satisfaction with their single lives continues to rise. Nadie nos enseña a amar y es por ello que, a menudo, nos vemos inmersos en relaciones amorosas cuyos únicos modelos son las películas románticas y la cultura pop. Jay Shetty se aleja de este concepto de amor etéreo, una mera colección de clichés, y establece los pasos específicos para desarrollar las habilidades que nos ayudaran a vivir y cuidar nuestro amor de la mejor forma posible. A lot of people say, “We just don’t love each other anymore, we’ve fallen out of love.” What that means is that love wasn’t enough. There were character traits that we needed that we didn’t find in that partner, that we didn’t recognize we needed to grow the relationship. The Gottman Institute, which publishes studies on relationships, talked about how the number one thing that keeps couples together is not date nights, holiday cruises, or walks on the beach, it’s their ability to learn how to argue, the ability to turn an argument into a discussion. Fighting and arguing push you apart, but discussion and debate bring you closer. My review at Newsblaze sounded a bit too harsh. THIS IS A GOOD BOOK. Not "new" and unprecedented but still useful those who have not read a gazillion other books about love and relationships. Most of my friends were in relationships. I basically felt single without Isla, and I didn’t want to be lonely, so I decided to join her. Instead of thinking about the pros and cons of moving—What were his job prospects? What was he leaving behind in Philadelphia? Who did he know in Austin? Did he like it there? Would this step benefit his relationship?—Leo was primarily focused on avoiding loneliness.

Romantic love is at once familiar and complex. It has been seen and described in infinite ways across time and cultures. Psychologist Tim Lomas, a lecturer in the Human Flourishing Program at Harvard University, analyzed fifty languages and identified fourteen unique kinds of love. The ancient Greeks said there were seven basic types: Eros, which is sexual or passionate love; Philia, or friendship; Storge, or familial love; Agape, which is universal love; Ludus, which is casual or noncommittal love; Pragma, which is based on duty or other interests; and Philautia, which is self-love. An analysis of Chinese literature from five hundred to three thousand years old reveals many forms of love, from passionate and obsessive love to devoted love, to casual love. In the Tamil language, there are more than fifty words for various kinds and nuances of love, such as love as grace, love within a fulfilling relationship, and a melting inside due to a feeling of love. In Japanese, the term koi no yokan describes the sensation of meeting someone new and feeling that you are destined to fall in love with them, and kokuhaku describes a declaration of loving commitment. In India’s Boro language, onsra describes the knowledge that a relationship will fade. As DePaulo says, “One of our challenges culturally is that we don’t tell positive affirming stories about people who are single.” Whether you look at movies, music, or TV shows, usually, even though people in relationships are struggling, it’s highlighted when someone’s alone. 2. Chemistry starts a relationship, but character makes it last. W tym roku, aż do teraz, odrzuciłam 100% propozycji współpracy przy poradnikach i sama z siebie nie kupiłam ani jednego. Zazwyczaj tak bardzo drażni mnie styl, w którym są napisane, że nie jestem w stanie przez nie przebrnąć. Ale są wyjątki… Nobody sits us down and teaches us how to love. So we’re often thrown into the world of relationships with nothing but romance movies and pop culture to help us muddle through. Until now. The ancient Greeks believed that there were seven basic types of love: Eros (sexual or passionate love), Philia (friendship), Storge (familial), Agápe (universal), Ludus (casual or non-committal), Pragma (based on duty), and Philautia (self-love). More recently, psychologist Tim Lomas, a lecturer in the Human Flourishing Program at Harvard University, analyzed 50 languages and identified 14 unique kinds of love.

8 Rules of Love Book PDF Summary

Shetty joined an ashram at age 21. For three years he lived as a monk, studying the Vedas, which were written more than five thousand years ago. Their relevance in the modern world “amaze and inspire” him, he writes in the Introduction. This book is rooted in Vedic principles, “applying Vedic concepts in ways they haven’t been used before, applying spiritual concepts to earthly relationships.”